Inner Maintenance (IMA)

pancakemarathon
Jul 4
6 min read

12 steps

We admitted we neglected ourselves and let others' needs distract us from our own well-being.
Came to believe that our needs matter and that care for ourselves restores us to sanity.
Made a decision to turn our energy toward our own healing and maintenance.
Made a searching and fearless inventory of how we've avoided self-care.
Admitted to ourselves, to another person, and to our Higher Power how we've abandoned our own needs.
Became entirely ready to treat ourselves with the love and care we so easily give others.
Humbly asked for the willingness to maintain ourselves without guilt.
Made a list of boundaries we've neglected and became willing to honor them.
Established those boundaries, when appropriate, without shame or explanation.
Continued to check in with ourselves and promptly addressed signs of burnout or neglect.
Sought through reflection, rest, and spiritual connection to improve our relationship with ourselves.
Having awakened to the value of self-care, we carried this message to others and practiced these principles in all our affairs.

13th Step Safeguard

We are here to restore ourselves, not to fix, rescue, or be the therapist for others. We safeguard this space to remind ourselves: You cannot pour from an empty cup. Trying to "save" others at the expense of your own wellness is a form of neglect disguised as care.

12 Traditions

Our personal well-being comes first; unity in this program depends on honoring our needs.
For our group purpose, there is but one authority — a loving Higher Power expressing care for us through each other.
The only requirement for IMA membership is a desire to care for oneself.
Each member is autonomous in how they practice self-care, provided it doesn't harm others.
Each group has one primary purpose — to support members in learning it's okay to take care of themselves.
An IMA group never substitutes therapy, medical care, or other professional help.
Every IMA group ought to be self-supporting, declining outside distractions or obligations.
IMA is non-professional, but our program offers peer support for self-maintenance.
IMA ought never be organized in a way that creates burnout or pressure.
IMA has no opinion on outside issues like diet trends or self-care fads.
We maintain personal anonymity and respect others' privacy, recognizing that self-care is sacred.
Anonymity reminds us that no one is better than another — we are all worthy of care.

12 Promises

We will feel worthy of our own care.
Guilt about meeting our needs will fade.
We will experience peace of mind without burnout.
Others’ problems will no longer consume us.
Our ability to say “No” will grow.
We will enjoy time alone without shame.
We will prioritize ourselves without fear.
We will respect our limits and energy.
The urge to fix others will soften.
We will discover joy in simply being.
Our relationships will improve through healthy boundaries.
We will realize self-maintenance is not selfish — it’s essential.

Slogans

“You Can't Pour From an Empty Cup.”
“Self-Care Isn’t Selfish.”
“Maintenance Over Martyrdom.”
“Boundaries Build Better Connections.”
“Put Your Own Oxygen Mask On First.”
“Rest Is Productive.”
“I Deserve My Own Time.”

Acronyms

IMA — Inner Maintenance Anonymous
S.O.S. — Start On Self
B.R.A.K.E. — Boundaries Restore And Keep Energy
P.A.U.S.E. — Protect And Understand Self Every day

Serenity Prayer

Higher Power, grant me the courage to care for myself,

The serenity to say no without guilt,

And the wisdom to know I am worthy of my own love.

Additional Prayers

1. Help me admit when I’m running on empty.

2. Show me I deserve to feel whole.

3. Guide me in choosing my own healing.

4. Let me see where I’ve abandoned myself.

5. Grant me the courage to own my truth.

6. Make me ready to receive my own care.

7. Remove my resistance to self-kindness.

8. Help me recognize and honor my boundaries.

9. Give me strength to uphold them.

10. Keep me aware of when I need a pause.

11. Deepen my connection with my true self.

12. Empower me to share this message by living it.

What Needs to Be Talked About:

It's not weak to rest.
Helping others is admirable, but not at your own expense.
Burnout is not a badge of honor.
Boundaries protect relationships, they don't destroy them.
It's okay to be the one who needs help.
You are worthy of the care you so freely give others.

How This Program Can Help:

Daily life use examples:

✔ Saying no without over-explaining.

✔ Scheduling time for your own care — like it’s non-negotiable.

✔ Recognizing emotional exhaustion early.

✔ Letting go of guilt for not being "available" 24/7.

✔ Asking for support without feeling like a burden.

✔ Reclaiming energy for your passions and joy.

step work

Learning It's Okay to Care for Me

Step 1:

We admitted we neglected ourselves and let others' needs distract us from our own well-being. Step Work:

List 5 ways you’ve neglected your own needs recently.
Write about a time you put yourself last and how it affected you.
How does playing "therapist" or fixer for others help you avoid working on you? Be honest.

Step 2:

Came to believe that our needs matter and that care for ourselves restores us to sanity. Step Work:

Write what the word "sanity" means to you in the context of self-care.
What would believing your needs matter look like daily?
Describe 3 people you admire who seem to take care of themselves. How does it inspire you?

Step 3:

Made a decision to turn our energy toward our own healing and maintenance. Step Work:

List areas of your life that need maintenance: physical, emotional, spiritual, etc.
Write a short “declaration” choosing to care for yourself.
How does choosing your healing feel — scary, exciting, unfamiliar? Explore that.

Step 4:

Made a searching and fearless inventory of how we've avoided self-care. Step Work:

Write about habits, beliefs, or excuses that block your self-care.
What fears arise when you think about putting yourself first?
Identify times you said "yes" to others but really meant "no" — how did that impact you?

Step 5:

Admitted to ourselves, to another person, and to our Higher Power how we've abandoned our own needs. Step Work:

Journal a letter to yourself admitting the ways you've abandoned your care.
Share some of this with a trusted person (sponsor, friend, therapist).
Reflect: How did admitting this lighten your load or increase awareness?

Step 6:

Became entirely ready to treat ourselves with the love and care we so easily give others. Step Work:

List ways you easily show care to others.
Pick 3 of those and brainstorm how to apply them to yourself this week.
What resistance do you feel toward giving yourself the same love? Write it out.

Step 7:

Humbly asked for the willingness to maintain ourselves without guilt. Step Work:

Write a simple prayer asking for the willingness to care for yourself.
Journal about where guilt shows up when you try to rest or set boundaries.
Imagine a life where guilt didn’t control your self-care — describe it.

Step 8:

Made a list of boundaries we've neglected and became willing to honor them. Step Work:

List boundaries you’ve ignored or allowed others to cross.
Highlight the ones you feel ready to enforce.
For the ones you’re unsure about, write your fears around them.

Step 9:

Established those boundaries, when appropriate, without shame or explanation. Step Work:

Practice saying “no” without long explanations — write a few examples.
Reflect on a recent boundary you set — how did it go?
If you’ve struggled, write how you’ll approach it differently next time.

Step 10:

Continued to check in with ourselves and promptly addressed signs of burnout or neglect. Step Work:

Create a daily or weekly self-check-in list (ex: How’s my energy? Am I resentful? Did I rest?).
Write about the last time you ignored signs of burnout — what were the consequences?
Plan 3 small acts of self-maintenance for the next week.

Step 11:

Sought through reflection, rest, and spiritual connection to improve our relationship with ourselves. Step Work:

List activities that help you feel connected to your inner self (ex: journaling, meditation).
Try one this week and reflect on how it felt.
Write a letter from your "Higher Self" encouraging you to keep caring for yourself.

Step 12:

Having awakened to the value of self-care, we carried this message to others and practiced these principles in all our affairs. Step Work:

Share your experience of learning self-care with someone who may need to hear it.
Write how your life has changed, or how you hope it will change, by practicing self-care.
Brainstorm how you’ll keep practicing self-maintenance long-term, even when life gets busy.

Categorized

Main Category: Personal Maintenance & Emotional Health

Also Fits:

✔ Codependency Recovery — why: plays into people-pleasing and neglect of self.

✔ Emotional Adulthood — why: learning to meet your own needs.

✔ Burnout Recovery — why: breaks cycles of self-neglect.

✔ Boundaries & Assertiveness — why: prioritizes healthy limits.

Alternative Program Name Ideas:

Self-Care Anonymous (SCA)
Permission to Pause (PTPA)
Caretaker Recovery (CRA) — for those who play therapist for others
Inner Maintenance Program (IMA)
Self First Fellowship (SFFA)
Invisible Needs Anonymous (INA)
Tired of Playing Therapist (TOPTA)